I have trouble stopping. My brain is constantly telling me, “go!” and it’s difficult for me to turn that off. Even when I’m physically at rest, I’m always thinking about the next thing that needs to be done, the next way to improve the systems I’m running in my life. More often than not, this leads to some sort of guilt - guilt that I’m not doing the right things, that I’m not doing enough, that I’m heading in the wrong direction. Imagine a captain steering his ship full-steam ahead but being unsure if he was about to hit an iceberg. I don’t know about you, but that’s not a ship I want to be on.
What I’m talking about at its core is anxiety. The anxiety to produce, the anxiety to succeed…the anxiety to live. My baseline state is anxious, and although it gives me almost superhuman abilities, it can also knock me out of it gets out of hand. The thing I have to remember is to STOP (notice the capital letters) - to take a day, a weekend, or even a week to let go of expectations, and to loosen up my vice grip on life and just “be” for a goddamn second.
That’s what I did today (mostly), and I encourage you to do the same. Everyone needs it. I know I’m not unique (*reluctant sigh*), and I know you have your own set of stresses and anxieties. If you bottle those up long enough, they will kill you. I’m not joking, and I’m not going to sugar coat it. It is my belief that many of our modern illnesses and health troubles stem primarily from stress and anxiety, so, just for today, let’s see what we can do to mitigate them. Seriously. Like, right now.
Whether you have one free hour or several, use that time to rest. If you don’t, plan some time over the next week to do absolutely nothing. Sure, you can read, watch Netflix, eat shitty food - whatever floats your boat. The key here is not to stress about your rest.
Do it imperfectly, on purpose.
Dangle, float, let loose a little bit.
Don’t worry about what’s next on the agenda or the things you have to get done.
Don’t listen to that voice in your head telling you you’re a piece of shit for not “making the most” out of your time.
Just be. Specifically, be like those kids in the picture at the beginning of this reflection. Does it look like they give a flying fuck about anything? I think not. That’s the natural state for all of us - free of worry, free of fear, free of pain. This is your reminder that you have access to it any time you want, and all you have to do is let yourself return to it. That’s what it is, a returning. You have it all inside you already. You don’t have to go anywhere or do anything crazy - you just have to let go for a minute.
Now, take a deep breath and get to it. I’ll leave you with some Bible wisdom, because why not?
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." - Philippians 4:6
P.S. I’m starting two separate newsletters aside from Daily Reflections.
If you’re interested in health & fitness, I’ll be starting a newsletter called The Bronzeman, which will be released every Sunday. It will cover weightlifting, different styles of training, nutrition and everything in between.
If you’re interested in poetry, I’ve started a newsletter dedicated entirely to poetry called Poetry in the Dark. Starting next week, this will be released once a week on Wednesdays.